The Secret Lives of Litterbugs
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Susan Oloier. Guys Like Us. Then she opened a can of Red Bull, half finished it and threw down that on the seat, too. It started leaking and rolling so I asked her to please pick up the can and wipe the seat. Her loud and half-crazed response is unprintable, full as it was with swear words and threats. The baby started yelling and the place turned to a mini-hell on earth. Other travellers looked deeply into their newspapers or smart phones. She won. Another time, in Camden, North London, some young men were drinking lager and throwing the empty cans at oncoming cars.
I told them that what they were doing was wrong and dangerous. I am small but can muster false bravado.
WHO’S A LITTERBUG?
Paxo, though, I am not. Monkey noises followed and I fled feeling defeated and humiliated. Again, the litter louts had won. I especially hate it when stuff comes flying out of moving cars. Once, having witnessed a cascade of trash from a car window and taken down a number-plate, I tried to report it to the nearest council. On Friday and Saturday nights, our local shopping areas are turned into cesspits of vomit and trash. At their worst, our parks now can have not only piles of dog mess which owners never bothered to clear up, but needles thrown by drug-users, condoms, blades and broken bottles.
The weekends are the worst. To find many of them so disrespected feels like sacrilege. One final example, perhaps the worst. A pensioner with a stick was waiting at the bus stop near where I live. As a bus pulled up, an ordinary-looking something woman finished her can of Diet Coke, threw it aside and boarded.
The old man stepped on the can, and nearly fell. Presenter Dame Joan Bakewell despaired: 'I'm disappointed people won't even walk ten metres to use another bin'. After he climbed inside, we watched in embarrassment as he politely told her what had happened.
Not your street. What, indeed, is the problem? An entire generation has grown up with no sense of the past, and therefore no capacity for comparison or judgment. Thus an essay on a small and seemingly unappealing subject becomes a scathing portrait of Modern Britain in all its vanity, grubbiness and corruption - and its occasional, lingering havens of decency. Likewise, amid the new barbarism of our public spaces, and the complacent, conformist blather of our chattering classes, the cool, dissenting voice of Theodore Dalrymple is a little oasis of sanity and truth.
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